As the interns continue their summer with Healing Faith they continue to share their perspective on life here in Uganda and life in the mission field.
Overcoming Fear- by Kellie James
For some people, following their call is easy. I know some missionaries who easily dropped everything once they felt called. I, however, didn't jump up, pack my bags, and run out the door. Rather, I fought back. I responded to God's calling by asking, ‘Really God? You want me to go there? How could I possibly help them?” What may have been stubbornness on the outside was my attempt to cover the fear I felt on the inside.
It quickly became clear that God was not going to let it go. Instead of continuing to ask questions, I began to make up excuses. I threw everything I could think of at God. It would be too expensive. It would be too much hard work. People wouldn’t support me. I didn’t have anything to offer. How silly I was to think that God wasn’t big enough to handle my obstacles. It turned out that getting to Africa was expensive, but God provided. It did take a lot of work, but God carried me through it.There were people who didn’t support me. Some of them even walked out on me because of my calling. However, more people than I could ever imagine threw in their support. It became apparent that I wasn’t alone on this journey.
Once everything started to align, my heart became fully committed to my calling. I knew that whatever crazy path God had me on, I would be taken care of. Despite understanding that I was being called, I had no idea why. Why on Earth would God call someone like me half way around the world to a village called Wakisi? I didn’t have any experience in mission work like most others. Just as I began to question God, the answer hit me. It had NOTHING to do with me but, rather, it had everything to do with Him. I may not live, love, or act the same way as the people I was going to meet in Uganda, but we both share Christ. He is our common reality and we are joined together in His life. So what was I so worried about anyway?
In the end, I overcame my fear by completely and wholeheartedly trusting God. Through my time of uncertainty, I sought answers through His word. Isaiah 41:10 brought me a lot of comfort when I felt afraid. "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." I gave my entire heart and my whole life over to Him. Not just the part that was easy to trust God with, but also the parts that were hard to give up.This included my life of comfort in the states. He called me to another continent, to a country I’ve never been to, and with people I’ve never met. I can honestly say I'm happy to trust God with all of it.
I know that fear is a normal reaction when it comes to answering the Lord's call. This is especially true if that calling requires you to step really far outside of your comfort zone. It's important to remember that what the enemy uses against you, God uses to lift you up. That's exactly what happened for me. God used my fear and turned it into spiritual growth and development. I'm forever thankful for his patience with me during this incredible journey.